In-laws: When the baby comes -- and so do they

Every dad needs support, encouragement, information, confidence and tools to help him be as involved as he possibly can with his new family. Our fatherhood expert, Armin Brott, author of Every dad needs support, encouragement, information, confidence and tools to help him be as involved as he possibly can with his new family. Our fatherhood expert, Armin Brott, author of The Expectant Father: Facts, Tips, and Advice for Dads-to-Be and Father for Life: A Journey of Joy, Challenge, and Change , has advice for your growing family!Your question
My mother-in-law is coming to stay after the baby is born. She has some pretty firm ideas about how my husband and I should raise our child. She says she just wants to help out but I'm worried she'll get in the way.

Read more articles See his book: The Expectant Father: Facts, Tips, and Advice for Dads-to-Be

Armin Brott answers:
Having people stay over to help with the newborn, especially parents (yours or your husband's), can be a dangerous thing. New grandparents sometimes may have more traditional attitudes toward parenting than younger parents. They may have different ideas about how babies should be fed, dressed, carried, played with and so on. And they may have very different ideas on how you and your husband should divide up the workload around the house and on how much he should be involved.

If you do have someone stay with you to help out after the birth, make sure they understand right from the beginning that while you're grateful for the help, you and your husband are the ones running the show and what you say ultimately goes.