I've known women (and their partners) who kept their soon-to-be baby's name on total lockdown. And I've known others who shared it with everyone they knew -- or didn't know, like the cable guy. I wasn't an over-sharer, but I was also excited to tell my friends and family our chosen name once my husband and I decided. So, what's an expectant mom to do? Following are some thoughts for your consideration.
Reasons to zip it:
1. You might change your mind
. Impossible, right? Not necessarily! I've heard of parents who chose a name they loved -- maybe even a family name -- but once they delivered their baby, they realized she so wasn't a "Sally." In fact, I even knew an adoptive parent who saw a photograph of her child and chose a name. However, when she actually met him, she realized he wasn't a "Jim" at all! 2. You don't want any alternate suggestions, also known as criticism
. If you've chosen an unusual name (Apple, anyone?) or a name that is typically assigned to the opposite gender, for example, you might decide to keep quiet until your baby actually arrives. I think that people are far less likely to be vocal about their, ahem, opinion, if there's an actual baby bearing the name. At least they're less likely to tell you directly that they disapprove. 3. You don't want anyone to hijack your name
. Now that just seems silly, but be honest. You can probably think of one person you know who might take your name. If that woman happens to be expecting and is due before you...well, that's a good reason not to share. I personally knew someone who had a relative take her baby's name after she declared it and then insist that she and her husband "totally loved that name already." Hmmmm.
Reasons to share:
1. You're excited!
That's why my husband and I shared. We were truly that stoked about the name we chose -- both times we adopted. We chose a somewhat unusual name for our son and tweaked the spelling (to name him after my brother) and we chose a fairly usual name for our daughter, but again altered the spelling a bit. I don't mind criticism (because I don't care!), so I wasn't worried about any disapproving comments. Plus, our names were so great, there was no way anyone could think of anything critical to say. *wink, wink* 2. You want to lay claim
: For the same reason you might want to keep quiet if you're worried about someone taking your name, you might want to publicly declare it to prevent it from happening. What do you think? Any great reasons to share or not to share? What did you do?
And, if you're still stuck and are having trouble coming up with a name for your baby, check out SheKnows Baby Names Page
for a million and one ideas. Okay, not quite that many, but close!