Where's The Desire?

When you're still bruised and bloody from the adventure of birth, somehow, the idea of sex seems to slip your mind. Okay, maybe that's not entirely true -- you didn't forget -- but the very notion of putting something back up into that spot just about makes you want to throw up.

Couple with newborn baby
So will you ever want to have sex again? In all likelihood, yes. Seriously. The only problem (at least for your guy) is that it may be many moons before you're up to the task. Your caregiver probably said to lay off for about six weeks, but we know of quite a few women who waited six months or more. It's one of those things that's hard to predict. Usually, the huge delay isn't about still hurting from the birth, it's about being exhausted and just plain touched-out from taking care of your baby (or babies) all the time. And of course, fear is part of it, too. If you gave birth vaginally -- and especially if you had stitches -- you're probably worried that it will hurt. One day, though, you will be ready to try again. We suggest on that day, you hire a babysitter, stock up on plenty of lubricant, and take a nice long luxurious time to get reacquainted before -- ahem -- completing the task. We're not going to promise you that lovemaking will be the same as before -- but for most women, it's as good as always if not better. Some lucky girls (and guys) really think it feels better than ever before. Whether that's because of lube, stretching things out a bit, or just a shift in hormones, we can't say, but if this is you, there's no need to question it -- just enjoy!

Read more:

Ann Douglas on sex after pregnancy
I'm 8 weeks postpartum and I'm still not ready to have sex. Is this normal?
When your sex drive doesn't come back postpartum
How to 'babyproof' your relationship
Baby on board: Keeping love alive

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