Hello Journal Readers
This week's entry is being written by Mommy Lady. As you know, week 14 detailed my life and how Kym felt about me and how she was raised. Kym sent me the entry while I was visiting my friend James in Atlanta. After I read the first few lines, I started reading it aloud because it was so funny that I wanted to share it with him. Needless to say that laughter turned into tears and I had to get him to finish reading it. I was blubbering all over the place... I was overcome with pride and awe that my Baby Girl had those feelings. James finished reading the entry and he was also a bit misty-eyed by it.
It's funny how motherhood will bring out the hero in you. I am fond of saying my children are the testament of my greatness. I say this because with every accomplishment they make, with every obstacle they overcome, with every goal they reach; I take partial credit for it. Why? Because I have tried to teach them the things they needed to know about life before they went to kindergarten. We, including children, are born of free will. Therefore we have the ability to choose for ourselves to do right or wrong. I see all three of them making more right choices than wrong. I have wonderful ladies and I am proud of them. I let them see me struggle and succeed, protected them from the world when needed, preached family unity, and developed rituals... you know, the stuff that glues the family together. Some of our antics happened by accident and remain today. My son-in-law Frank has become so much like us that at times I feel like I raised him too and I love him with the same protective fierceness. He will be a great Daddy!
On October 31, 2000, Frank pulled me into their room and handed me a pregnancy test stick. He had been sick with an upset stomach and had all the nasties that accompany it. He handed me the stick and told me that the reason he had been sick was because he was pregnant. I was dumbfounded. I took it and looked at that positive sign and said something profound. I said, "Frank, you mean to tell me you wee-wee'd on the stick and tested positive?" Kym was standing there and they both burst out laughing. Then it dawned on me -- Kym was pregnant! After the whooping and hollering, hugging, and crying were over, and the last trick or treater had left the yard, I went into the quiet of the night and prayed a mighty prayer that my Kymmie and Frankie Pooh would be blessed with the wisdom and strength to be great parents. I worried, oh how I worried. I knew how much this pregnancy meant to the both of them. I had seen the emotional struggle Kym went through coping with her sister's pregnancy. I saw tears that were shed month after month. I remembered my own devastating pain when I miscarried. I prayed a mighty prayer that nothing would go wrong and that they would have a healthy baby and that Kym would not suffer too much of the pains that come with this blessed event.
Her doctor was true to his word and saw her a couple of days after Frank wee-wee'd on the stick. He ordered an ultrasound, and the technician that did it told them that she could not find the baby. She went on to tell them that it might be a blighted ovum. Of course they were concerned and wanted to know what that meant. She told them, and that was the beginning of a hellish weekend. I called home before I left work and was told the news. I rushed home and went into the mommy mode and tried to calm the fears by saying everything would be all right, because if it wasn't I would have felt it in my heart. My children have such blind faith in me that it was enough to calm Kym and Frank a little.
One of my titles Kym left out in her journal entry was The Internet Queen. Late that night, when I was sure she was asleep I hit the Internet with a vengeance. I had never heard of a blighted ovum. By the time I was finished pulling up site after site, I knew enough about the subject and related topics that I would have rivaled anyone with Doctor in the front of their name. I would have kicked much butt if we were playing Jeopardy! and the category was Blighted Ovum... I would have wagered it all if the final Jeopardy! answer had anything remotely to do with it!
The following week, another appointment later, I was staring Kym and Frank down, waiting for them to tell me what the doctor said. Frank handed me a pretty box shaped like a star and Kym primly said... "We wanted to give this to you to show you how much we appreciate you". I felt their happiness and knew everything was fine... I opened the box and inside were two bibs and two pacifiers. Dumbfounded again! Under the bibs was an ultrasound picture of two tiny dots... Baby A and Baby B. After I got off the floor the whooping and hollering started again. Thank you God!
Now here we are in week 16. Kym is no longer hugging the toilet for all it's worth. She has survived the first few weeks in her own home. Okay, okay this survival still counts even though she comes to my house every day. Frank is taking excellent care of her... I hear he even tried to do yoga with her! She is growing so fast that we may really have to get a wheelbarrow to move her from point a to point b. She is glowing with health and has endured the worst of what she has faced already with a purpose and motherly sacrifice. She will be fine the duration of this pregnancy because she has wanted this and is willing to go through it all to get these babies here healthy. My baby girl, a mommy!
I have no doubts in my ex-military mind that they will be the best of parents. I have read some of the responses to Kym's other journal entries and I want to leave you all with these thoughts. I believe Pope John Paul II said: it is easier for parents to have children than it is for children to have real parents. Think about that for a minute... look up the word parent, you might be surprised at the definition. Catch your kids doing right more than wrong. Admit when you are wrong and apologize to them. It teaches them to do the same thing. We are not perfect, and our children do not need to view us as the Great and Powerful Oz, but as the little guy that was behind the smoke screen. He was filled with compassion, wisdom, and enough savvy to put the Tin Man in his place when he thought he couldn't give him a heart. Let your little ones make simple choices early in life so that they grow up learning what they choose will impact their lives. When you have to discipline them, do so lovingly and consistently. There is a difference between discipline and punishment. Hug your babies often; tell them you love them everyday. Help them learn the intrinsic value of doing well. Be unconditional in your love.
My prayers are with all of you. I wish you love and happiness in your lives. May the wonders you all carry be the source of more happiness than sorrows (excluding the adolescent years).
Kym asked me if I would still buy her toothbrushes now that she is on her own and about to become a mommy herself. Well Kymmie Kym, as long as there is breath in me, I will buy you toothbrushes, and drawers too if yours get too raggedy. Know why? Because you will always be my baby. You will be fine, I promise. I will always be here if you need me. You honor me and let me honor you by being the first to call you Mommy Lady II, for anyone that goes through the stages of severe morning sickness like you did and refused to take medication is well on her way to earning the title.