Since that time I've spent hours fantasizing how awesome it would be to find a Catholic midwife: someone who could understand the need to pray the Hail Mary during labor, someone willing to pray along with me, someone to encourage me spiritually during the task of labor, someone who wouldn't bat an eye when I stated that breastfeeding and NFP are the only forms of "family planning" we use.
But when you're interviewing a midwife, you can't just come out and ask "Are you Catholic?" Sure, if you maybe see some sign, like a crucifix or a Miraculous Medals hanging from a chain around her neck, then maybe the question wouldn't seem rude or out of place.
So, I've been e-mailing with this one midwife who lives a couple of hours away for months now. We even met once while I was interviewing another midwife earlier in my pregnancy. Since I've enjoyed the time, space, and autonomy of caring for myself during this pregnancy, I've really been lagging behind on making a commitment one way or the other regarding who, if anyone, should be attending this child's birth later this summer. I finally decided the decision should be placed in God's hands, that I would arrange for my husband to meet with this midwife, and the rest would work itself out.
She came over one afternoon this past week. God bless her for making the trek to our house, not knowing for sure if she was going to be asked to be hired or what. I had known for some time this midwife, M, was a Christian, I just didn't know what variety she was. I noticed a small Miraculous Medal hanging from her neck, but I quickly rationalized with myself that she could be wearing it much like my husband's grandmother wears it, because someone gave it to her. Well, sometime into the "getting to know you" conversation, my husband states, "Val said that you are a Christian, and that's important to us." She replies, "I'm Catholic. Catholics are Christians the last time I checked." Then Matt said, "Well, we are too. That's cool, a Catholic midwife!" Any tension that was there just melted away.
To make a long story a little shorter, it looks like we will be having M at this birth as long as God sees a way for her to be here. I'm comfortable with that and so is DH. DH would really like "someone" to be here, I think just to help keep his head together, and I can't say I blame him for feeling that way... "and that's...OK" (said in my SNL Gary Smalley voice). Why I haven't trusted God with these matters in previous pregnancies is beyond me. But, wow, He is so good to us!
Until next time,